Yesterday I wrote about my appearance on The Surrogacy Lawyer,  which is a radio show hosted by Theresa Erickson Esq.  The show centers around building families the “non-traditional” way – whether through IVF, egg donation, sperm donation, embryo donation, or surrogacy.

What I like about “The Surrogacy Lawyer” is that the show focus’s on all parties that may be involved – whether you are an egg donor, sperm donor, surrogate, embryo donor or a prospective parent.

It was really fun participating yesterday – when we took on the issue of the rights of egg donors, and explored the new documentary “Eggsploitation”.  I was really flattered that the segment was inspired by a series of blogs that I did on the subject that inspired a very vibrant Facebook debate!

If you missed the broadcast yesterday – you can listen now via the pod cast! Don’t you love technology?  Click Here To Listen To The Pod Cast “Who Is Looking Out For The Egg Donor”

Are you interested in the blogs that inspired the debate?

Gird Your Loins and Hold Onto Your Ovaries!

Egg Donation From a Different Perspective

What’s Your Egg Donation Agenda

Do you want to join in on the conversation? You can leave a comment here – but I encourage you to “friend me” on Facebook at PamelaMadsen – or just click the Facebook icon on the page to get connected to me! Inside Facebook – we are are having lots of ongoing conversations about this and so much more! Looking forward to talking with you on line!!!

Posted under "Eggsploitation", Egg Donation, Egg Donor Compensation, IVF, In Vitro Fertilization, Infertility, egg donors

Yesterday, I blogged about “Eggsploitation: The Fertility Industry Has a Dirty Little Secret” And then I did what I do – and put it on Facebook and Twitter.  I have all kinds of “friends” – people that I know and don’t know which include many “insiders” in the fertility industry. And  what I saw was the beginning of what has been a gradual self examination practice when it comes to the business of egg donation – and the beginnings of a discussion about how the industry educates egg donors. I would love to help encourage that discussion to continue.

The education of egg donors has been important to me for a very long time.  I may have told this story before – but it is worth telling again.  It also speaks to how money controls public education.  In my day of running patient organizations I had to get funding for all of my educational fact sheets (because there is no federal funding of patient organizations as there exists in some countries like The Netherlands). Getting industry funding for fact sheets at patient organizations is a practice that continues today across the board at many non profits.  Just check the fact sheets – you will see sponsorship listings.  There is no big secret there.

So once upon a time, I wanted to do a fact sheet for potential egg donors – and I asked a big famous doctor at a big famous IVF Center to sponsor it.  I got a big fat yes – and I began the process of writing it. When the doctor got a hold of the fact sheet – he screamed that he was withdrawing the funding because the fact sheet was going to encourage the egg donor to ask too many questions – and answering these questions would take precious time away from the business of running his program.  Would I like to pay him for the time lost in answering egg donor questions that the fact sheet would provoke?

That fact sheet was never created because no one wanted to fund it. It was bad for business.

No matter how conflicted I feel about “Eggsploitation” (you can read their press release here) – especially their portrayal of the egg donor recipient as shown in the trailer on their website, I am glad that The Center For BioEthics and Culture Network produced it. Because while it may be extreme in it’s point of view – it is telling a point of view that needs to be told – and is not being told anywhere else. We need to make room for this perspective on egg donation – because it is real. These young women who are telling their stories are real – even if they don’t represent the majority of the egg donor experiences – it doesn’t make their experience any less valid or important. We need to hear them.

Everyone in the baby making world wants to feel like they are doing the right thing by egg donors, egg donor recipients, and most of all – the children that are created from that match. But money influences the waters. And without egg donor compensation there would be no egg donors. We all know that.

And money influencing the fertility field is not unique to the fertility field – it is a constant factor in every field – that is why big Pharma can’t buy dinner, or even give out pens anymore. We have all begun to acknowledge that fact.  It doesn’t matter how big or how small the donation is – money has this awful habit of controlling things.  And I have no answers – because every one needs money – and money pays the bills to keep the doors open for everyone. Even The Center for Bio Ethics and Culture Network has funders with a point of view.

But I do get disturbed with I see patient organizations with more professional/industry invested board members than patient board members.  And I do get even more disturbed – when I look deeper at who is running the ships – and there is an over abundance of board members in one part of the industry that we as a fertility community depend on for our unbiased information.  It is not that folks who serve in the industry or on non profit boards are evil doers – it is just that we need balance.  And without that balance of professions and areas of interest – there is an  influence in very quiet ways in regard to  the information that the consumer receives.

Yes – it is time for us to go deeper and really look at what information is shared with the consumer – how the information is being positioned – and who in the end – the creation of the educational materials are truly serving.  We must always keep in the front of our brains that consumer education is not marketing.

Posted under Advocacy, Egg Donation, Egg Donor Compensation, Facebook, Fertility, Fertility Blogs, Fertility Education, Fertility Marketing, IVF, In Vitro Fertilization, Infertility, Infertility Funding, egg donors, eggs, patient advocacy

A colleague of mine sent me a link to “Eggsploitation: The Fertility Industry Has a Dirty Little Secret” late last night – her email simply had the link – and word “WOW”.

I sat watching with my mouth looking like a bass fish  – open and gaping – as several young women told their horrifying story of being an egg donor in the United States. They spoke of feeling enticed by the money into donating their eggs – the poor explanations of what they could experience – and the tragedy of the complications that they unexpectedly faced as egg donors. The trailers on the website are riveting – and appalling.

It is certainly not a view – that recipient couples, egg donor coordinators, fertility specialists, and egg donor agencies will likely be comfortable seeing. But does that make it any less valid an exploration?

That is the struggle that those of us who live inside the fertility “industry” really have to grapple with.  So often – when these types of images of the fertility field are presented – we shout “foul play”! We pound our chests – and blog our hearts out about how unfair the media is to our field. You can hear us shout that
the entire story is never told – that the world of infertility is highly sensationalized  and distorted in order to sell magazines – or this evening news story.

Quite frankly – there is a great deal of truth in that opinion and outrage.  Frankly – even in the title of the documentary – calling the experience of egg donors a “dirty little secret’ is beyond over of the top. But the producers of the film  are marketing a documentary! If there is no dirty little secret – why buy a ticket?

And there will be people who will watch the clips – and perhaps even go see the documentary – who will come out drawing an analogy of these young women to aviation safety records – “You know – airplanes land safely every day across the country – thousands of them – and you never hear about that! But if ONE plane goes down – boy does that make the news!”  That’s because there is tragedy when even one airplane goes down – and we need to hear about it.

That is how I feel about “Eggsploitation” even where it fails in it’s own sensationalism. I am still wanting to hear the stories of these young women. It’s that important.  Look -  I didn’t like the trailer featuring the “experts” who said that egg donation is about rich older women taking advantage of younger women with good eggs. That is really horse shit – and shows a complete lack of understanding about the women who need donor egg.  I have never met a woman who needs donor eggs who is anything but grateful to donors. And the majority of the women who need donor egg are not rich.  That characterization was frankly wrong and horrifying – and in my mind brings down the messages that perhaps “Eggsploitation” is trying to get out.

We have to be very, very careful – with the young women who step up to donate their eggs.  We need to be careful about donor compensation being so high that young women feel enticed. We have to do a better job educating donors about the risks of egg donation – no matter how good everyone in the fertility field feels they are already doing it – we will have to do it better. These young women are making what I call “life time decisions” when they decide to donate their eggs. Even when their cycles go perfectly well (and most of them do) – these young women are giving up their genetic material forever – and exposing their bodies to a lot of unknowns in the process at a very young age.  That is simply real.

And we all have to cop to the fact – that no matter how careful we are – no matter how much time is spent – and how carefully these young women are consented and educated in the best of circumstances – people make all kinds of informed  decisions – for all kinds of reasons.

And sometimes – things just don’t go as planned.  And all we are left with is regret, pain and anger.

Posted under Egg Donation, Egg Donor Compensation, Fertility, egg donors, eggs, infertiity

This morning I awoke with the birds at my friend Donald’s house in East Hampton.  Yesterday was his birthday – so I came out for chocolate cake and candles. At my house the kids are home from college. Tyler is about to enter his last year at Parson’s School of Design for a degree in technology and design (did I mention that he made the Deans List?) - and I was sure that he was enjoying the empty house with his long time girlfriend Robyn, who is also one year away from graduation from Barnard in Russian Studies.  They are beautiful, smart kids.

I found myself thinking of Robin while I read this incredibly rough piece on egg donation “Pomp and Circumstances vs. Prey and Coercion by Jennifer Lahl. The author contends that college girls are targeted as they approach graduation laden with student loan debt to donate their eggs for easy, fast cash – and that they are not cared for well by the fertility industry.  In fact – Jennifer contends that they are preyed upon – not given the facts of egg donation – and often not cared for well by the doctors that take their eggs. Ms. Lahl paints a pretty ugly picture.

I had to take a big, deep breath after I finished reading. It’s because I can’t defend the “fertility industry” here. And it’s not that I think that Ms. Lahl has it all right – sure I bet those stories are true – but I also know of lots of fertility centers that treat egg donors with golden gloves – and I have talked to many egg donors that have had positive experiences. But still – her reporting is true enough – and  I have had mixed feelings about advertising on college campuses for years. I don’t like it. Yes, I understand that the recipient couples want young, healthy eggs of a certain age – and that college campuses are a great place to catch those eggs.  But when I think of my son’s girlfriend Robyn – I cringe.

As a fertility advocate – I believe that I am an advocate for all people who are interested in fertility – not just the infertile.  And I have been critical of the rising fees paid for egg donation for long time. I remember when in the NY tri state area the compensation was $2500.  And then how it jumped to like $8000 over night. I remember going head to head with some big names reproductive endocrinologists and being told to mind my own business, that they could do what they wanted. And if they needed to raise the price of compensation to attract donors that they would do what they needed to do.

I was also told that the compensation was at a fair number if you compared it with what women have to go through versus what men have to do to donate their sperm.  Figure it out – I was told. It’s fair.  I was also told that this was not my concern – and they would do what they needed to do to get donors.

“But isn’t $8,000 enticement?” I asked.  “I mean if I was 20 years old – $8,000 would entice me! Heck – it might entice me now! I don’t know if i would think of the long term effect on egg donation on my life. I think that I might be thinking Cancun instead! These are forever decisions – we have to make  sure that the money is there – compensation is important – but we have to be careful about that line between what is fair and what is enticement.”

My arguments which was sometimes picked up by women’s magazines – went mostly unheard by fertility specialists. Yes – this is an industry. Money is made every day in the world of baby making  – and there  is absolutely nothing dirty about that. And I hate it when fertility doctors and the field at large is painted as hawks going after the sweet little mice. That isn’t fair either. In the end – there are very few innocents left in this world. We are all compensated for our time and effort in a economic  world – but we do have to be careful and mindful about our behavior and the means to our ends. Yes – we need egg donors. Yes – they need to be compensated. But do ads really belong on college campuses? I don’t think so. Somehow it is ugly to me. And the money should be enough to compensate a donor – but not cloud their judgement.

I remember several years ago when I was the Executive Director  of The American Fertility Association and I wanted to get a fact sheet on egg donation funded. I got an initial funder – a big IVF center in the North East said that they would sponsor it. I was so excited. I felt like we needed a fact sheet for egg donors that  talked about all of the physical and emotional implications of being an egg donor.  When the director of the IVF center got the copy – he withdraw his sponsorship. He told me that he was too busy to be answering the questions of the women that this fact sheet would raise. That the fact sheet was going to raise too many questions for egg donors – and that the fact sheet might not only be a  time waster for him with potential egg donors in answering questions – but could possibly discourage egg donors from donating.

This fact was well researched and based on the information that was given by experts in the field.  Even a therapist that was very well known from this director’s center participated. The fact sheet had it’s funding withdrawn – and it was shut down. That is the under belly of patient education. That is where Ms. Lahl got it right – there is lots of conflict  of interest.

And me? I would love to see these young women at college campuses get information about egg freezing so that they can preserve their own eggs for their future – in stead of some time in the future needing to depend on other young women for eggs so that they can have children. And guess what? Fertility Preservation is a business too….and the beat  goes on…..

Posted under Egg Banking, Egg Donation, Egg Freezing, Fertility, egg donors, eggs

I get calls all the time from the media wanting to know what I think the future is in fertility. They all want to know what is the next big story. What is interesting to me, is that the next big story has been the same next big story for a while now. It is all about women learning about their biological clock – and then being able to actually do something about it. The next big story is how egg freezing can change the lives of women and future of young women planning their lives – there is no bigger story. The evolution and integration of egg freezing as an option for healthy young women as a way of planning their reproductive future will do as much to create sociological change in the lives as women as contraception did. Let’s face it -the corporate world is not the only place where there has been a glass ceiling for women to break through. There has also been a glass ceiling when it comes to the adverse relationship between our biological lives and our sociological lives. Simply stated – our reproductive potential – our biological clock – has been like Big Ben in London! It has been completely unchanged while our lives as women has gone through a complete re-write! Mother nature is not a feminist! She is still stuck on the idea that we should have our children young. And I do mean young!!! Our eggs are the most vibrant at an age when most people are in high school and college! There is a reason why egg donor recruiters advertise in college newspapers!!! That’s because it is young women who have the strongest reproductive potential – and the older women whose eggs are past their reproductive prime have to reach into that young egg basket to have the children of their dreams. I am all about how we change that paradiam. What I see as the future is a sharp decrease in the use of donor eggs. What I see is young women truly getting the information that they need to understand their reproductive potential early – and making real life decisions about their reproductive lives in a conscious way. A part of that decision making process could include banking their eggs – and when they are ready to have children perhaps as late as their forties – a time when they might have needed donor eggs – they simply use their own banked eggs and become their own egg donors.

Think about how birth control changed the lives of women. Once women were able to have some kind of handle on the size of their family and the timing of their conceptions – the world changed for women. Add in the right to choose – and most feminist groups thought that they had it all sewed up for women’s reproductive rights. Unfortunately – this was not completely true. We were still dealing with two thirds of the equation. A women’s reproductive rights do include contraception (the right to use them or not) and the right to choose. But a women’s reproductive rights should also include the right to have a baby if she wants one. And because of the lack of information on this subject and the slower pace of medical break throughs around fertility preservation – this has been the missing piece of the pie until now.

This truly is the next big story. The technology of egg freezing is moving at light speed. The American Society of Reproductive Medicine put out a statement about the technology, stating the egg freezing should not be marketing to women as a reliable way to defer child bearing. I agree with ASRM that women truly need to be fully informed about this technology - and be totally aware that NOTHING in the world of medicine is a sure thing. My brand new root canal just failed – and I am now getting that tooth pulled and an implant. So, let’s be clear when it comes to bodies and medical technology – there is NEVER a sure thing ….but with research and making good choices we certainly can hedge our bets! I also think that egg freezing technology has made incredible advances in just this past year with the use of CGH and newer egg freezing techniques. I do not think this it is unethical to talk to women about egg freezing and offer it to them as a possible means of preserving their fertility. Actually I believe that it is unethical not to raise it.

You know, 20 years ago I did an experimental procedure called IVF. If ASRM had put out such a statement in regards to this medical procedure with low outcomes – I might have been too frightened to try. Instead – I was fully consented by my doctors – and I was successful – as was my sister. Our oldest boys are both 20 years old. I wonder how much of ASRM’s concerns are based on the fact that we now live in a litigious society….and that they didn’t want to be blamed or sued for not putting out such a warning. I do not know. But the fact is that egg freezing has become a viable options for women – and trust me on this – it is the next big story in changing the lives of women.

Posted under Egg Freezing, Fertility, Infertility, The American Society for Reproductive Medicine

A few days ago a friend of mine sent me this link to Chelsea Lately Egg Donation on U Tube.

The scene is that Chelsea Lately has decided to donate her eggs and presents herself as an egg donor. Okay. Okay. Okay. It is funny first off. Richard Paulson, MD, world famous reproductive endocrinolgist, dead panning as Chelsea asks him to tell her that he loves her before he inserts the ultra sound probe. Chelsea whipping out the dust buster to suck out the eggs….it’s funny! I laughed out loud. But I find myself once again cringing…just a little. Now why is that?

No one seems to be bothered by the video. This video has been on line for months – and this is the first that I have heard about it. There does not seem to be any criticism of it on line. The fertility bloggers haven’t picked it up for better, or for worse. In fact no one seems to have noticed it – or be upset except my friend who sent it to me in a rant about how the fertility field was going to the dogs.

"It’s not the Chelsea schtick that bothers me (she is who she is), but it’s the fact that Dr. Paulson participated. I can’t imagine any other doctor would have done this for say…mental illness or obesity. What about that news commentator that got completely slammed for accidentally using the work “retard” to refer to something stupid? Why are we in the fertility field fine with just letting infertility patients and their treatments be misrepresented and even worse mocked and made fun of? No one else in other fields seem to be this complaisant. I just don’t understand".

My friend is feeling grumpy – and after reading her rant I felt kind of grumpy too. I decided that I needed a reality check, so I posted it on my Face book where lots of other Fertility Types hang out. I wanted to know how they felt about it. Many thought it was simply hysterical and one even thought it was “educational” – now that scared me just a little! But I guess – it was in some kind twilight zone kind of way. It did bother a few that one of the leading doctors in the field participated…but otherwise they didn’t have a problem with it.

I guess it is just that sometimes it feels that the field of reproductive medicine or, as it is commonly know, “the fertility industry”, is being spoofed all on its own. What with Dr. Jeffrey Steinberg doing his own incarnation of mad scientist gone wild and Dr. Michael Kamrava wanting to see how many embryos a human body can gestate at one time. Oh – and don’t forget the IVF Raffles!

It’s been a tough year – perhaps some of us are losing our sense of humor.

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Posted under Egg Donation, In Vitro Fertilization, Infertility, egg donors

Nobody in the fertility field likes to draw too much attention to egg donor compensation – and the issues that surrounds it. It is bad for business – and it could be bad for couples that need donor eggs to build their families. Over my many years of working as a fertility advocate – egg donor compensation has always been a hot button issue. Everyone likes the idea that women who donate their eggs do it completely out of the goodness of their heart…because they are motivated and drawn to helping infertile women have a child.  And, many of them may feel really good about that part of the equation. But the hard facts are – in countries where there is no egg donor compensation there are no egg donors.  Egg donor compensation is crucial for keeping egg donation alive.

Egg donation remains a way for young women with few financial resources to raise between $8,000 and $10,000 in a relatively short period of time.  Some egg donors do this over and over again – traveling from one center to another with no one tracking their donation history. And there have always been rumors of some young women being paid much higher numbers to correspond with their SAT scores, good looks, and where they are enrolled in college. Doesn’t sound pretty – does it?  Well, sometimes it’s not.

A recent article from CNN reports on the recent rise of potential egg donors across the country.

The women profiled in the story are quite clear – they need the money to make ends meet. Now – not just anyone can be an egg donor.  Egg donors have to go through a rigorous physical and psychological screening process – but how do we feel about women being so highly motivated by compensation? Does it matter? Should anyone care that the numbers of egg donors have risen with a falling economy? Do we need even more safety checks in the system to make sure that these women truly understand that while they are fixing short term economic problems in their lives – that they are making life time decisions about giving up their genetic material. Desperate people do desperate things – and do we want desperate egg donors who are lured in by big compensation dollars?

Today more than ever – all of us in the “baby making business” have to be more vigilant than ever in managing the lines between fair compensation and enticement.  Because as we all  know – the compensation will be spent – and the decisions that these women are making now more than ever out of financial stress – are decisions that they will have to live with for a life time.

Posted under Egg Donation, Infertility, egg donors